I had a really great pride this year, but I was also troubled by comments I heard over the last week from a lot of people in both the mainstream and radical queer communities. I want to say a few things about cissexism, specifically towards trans women and other MTF spectrum folks.
1) Gay sex does not require genital symmetry.
Most people in the community realize that not all women have the same sex organs, but it seems that a lot of people have a harder time making the leap to realize that you can have super gay sex with someone who has different junk than you. If you think otherwise, you are probably alienating people in your community, not to mention potentially missing out on some hot queer sex!
2) Gay sex does not mean non-potentially-reproductive sex (see point #1).
A lot of people like to claim the contrary… things like, “dykes never have to worry about getting pregnant” and other such nonsense. Claiming that all gay sex is non-reproductive erases the experiences of a lot of trans people and their lovers, and also makes it harder to talk about birth control and safer sex.
3) Don’t call different types of genitals disgusting.
This seems to be a disturbingly common trend in the queer community and has come up several times this week. A lot of people have a hard enough time trying to feel good and confident in their bodies - and welcome in their queer community - without having to hear how disgusting other people think their junk is. This goes for all aspects of peoples’ bodies.
Basically, we all need to have a little sit down and think about the different body/gender combinations that exist in our community and how the things we say and do affect the people around us!
